THE REAL PRESENCE

CHRIST IN THE EUCHARIST

Reflections on My Time in Eucharistic Adoration

by Andy Cirmo

At adoration hours I find that it is very easy for me to put my thoughts and feelings down on paper; and I find myself writing sometimes well past the hour I originally planned. It feels so good just to be here, in His physical presence, that I felt compelled a few months ago to start writing. Now it seems that every time I’m here in adoration I’m writing more and more about the incredible gift we have been given and we continue to be given every moment of every day “until the end of days”.

Try writing down your thoughts on the Blessed Sacrament or your dialog with God, if you are called to do it. The pen expresses what’s in my heart. The more I write, the more I find myself entering deeper into my relationship with God and appreciation for this miracle and mystery.

These are my private thoughts and musings, yet as I re-read them it occurred to me that these certainly are not just my experiences. These words can apply to just about anyone who spends time in the Lord’s presence. So, please enjoy reading and reflecting on these words as I do, and hopefully your heart will be as filled as mine is with the awe and wonder of being here in His presence.

“For it is good to be here”

********

I

I wander, sway, and drift away
As my life’s journey passes by
I have not seen where I have looked
For causes or for reasons why

From You I came yet wandered far
So far I could barely see
From where I came, You still remain
Forever patient, waiting just for me

But lately now I’ve come to know
You present in every way
In my loves and fears and often doubts
You’re always here, right here, to stay

I found some time I thought was mine
And gave some back to You
In thanks and praise for what you’ve done
I’ve thanked You, times, far to few

Yet in this place I stop to pray
That I could find You too
And spend an hour in this place away
From life’s pulls and back to You

The peace I find in just one hour
With the One who created it all
Stays with me as I leave and live
Remaining when I trip and fall

The joy I find in being here
In an hour spent alone in prayer
Comes with me and spreads to those I meet
His love makes me complete

This simple gift of bread and wine
Which for us has become His gift Divine
Is here, right here. There’s no greater love,
Remaining till the end of time.

II

I sit and wait Lord
As You Yourself asked of me
When in that last sacred garden
Of timeless pain and beauty…Gethsemane

I wait for Your grace
To lead me Your way
And pray while I’m waiting
To You, in thanks, this day

As You in the garden
So asked that it pass
This cup, You have served me
So I take on this task

I pray, my mind drifting
From darkness to the light
For guidance in confusion
For the gift of clear sight

My vision so clouded
By worldly pursuit
Needing bright and clear judgment
Or my journey be moot

So I sit and I wait
Listening with mind and my heart
To Your voice and call
Hoping never again to be apart

Show me, tell me, help me Lord
Lead me, teach me, and heal me
I search while time slowly passes
For what You’ve planned for me

III

To open my soul’s hidden valley
I pray ever so deeply
That Your life I may enter
And salvation so keep

I pray now, heart wide open
To receive what You send
Here may I be present
And my heart so to mend

Asking for favors
And for help along my way
In Your presence I, Your creature
Kneel humbly and pray

This gift, You, God, Creator
Almighty Lord, and King
In awe now and in timeless wonder
Of this miracle do I sing

For me, in my sinfulness
You became like us, just to save
And now here with us forever
Till the end of all days

Bring me out of this valley
Onto the heights of your kingdom
And into Your presence always
For this I pray

IV

An hour with You dear Jesus
Is just a hint of heaven to me
When my life reaches its end
And my calling is unto Thee

There I’ll forever sing Your praises
As I return to Your timeless home
Never to wander or wonder again
And know that I’ll no longer roam

From darkness into Your light
My spirit will soar to Your side
When my time, just here passes
Time itself no longer need to bide

I sit here in prayer by minutes
But to You there is no time
For a moment in Your presence
Is forever in my mind

An hour with You dear Jesus
Passes sooner than it seems
And the closeness that I feel here
Is the stuff of real dreams

For one day when my end comes near
You will surely be there for me
No matter when or where nor how long
To set my spirit free

So I spend these minutes in silence
Singing and raising praise to You
Who have loved me so much as this
That You remain here always and true

Thank You almighty Creator
For this gift of presence so here
Knowing that You love us that much
Calms my inmost fear

V

Your graces come like a mountain breeze
From heights where cool freshness abounds
Soothing pain, healing wounds
Healing souls, on this Holy ground

Majestic and skyward as the peaks, Your love
Soaring above all earthly fray
Lifting up my head now I can clearly see
Your mercy in everything and way

Like an alpine stream, crystal clear
Refreshing the plains below
Your mercy cascading from Holy springs
Healing my wounds with their endless flow

I climb my mountains sore and weak
And look up from my daily sorrow
To reach a place closer to You dear Lord
Away from this life here below

As the eagle soars to its safe haven
I soar unto You
Out of my life’s confusion
To a place away, here with You

You lift me up when I call to You
And cry for help in this place
Your strength, my fortress
Empowering me with Your grace

VI

It is good that I am here
Before You and hour this day
Before You my life is an open book
Showing all I do and say

Oh glorious, marvelous Lord on high
You gave Yourself for us this way
In bread and wine You stay with us
For all times and still today

To You my very life I bring
My joy, my troubles and my pain
You know my inmost secrets Lord
Yet shower Your mercy like rain

I need Your help to live this life
Alone I’m blind and can not see
You help, my strength refreshes now
For this life’s journey; all I need

You call to me in the quiet of life
When I am looking and waiting to hear
And tell me all will be ok
That I have nothing but sin to fear

Thank You for the gifts You send
To me in surprising ways
And help me use them to Your honor
All of my earthly days

VII

An hour I spend before You Lord
My hopes and dreams today I bring
You’re always here in every way
For this gift in thanks I sing

It is good that I am here oh Lord
In Your presence I humbly pray
For help in staying close to You
In all I do and say

Your smile of love, I feel today
On my frail imperfect life
Your never ending love remains’
To help me in times of strife

I bring to You my broken-ness
Your arms embrace my need
And hold me close in perfect love
My very soul You feed

I bring to You my joy
In what You have given to me
And humbly offer it back with thanks
For without You I cease to be

I kneel and wonder where to turn
On life’s curving path I lead
And pray for Your direction and sign
That Your way I may finally see

VIII

I bring to You all my broken-ness
My hurts and pains and needs
My insecurities and daily fears
My sins and painful deeds

I’ve taken gifts and squandered them
For reasons wrong I know
Yet even more Your grace You send
On me, Your mercy, You show

How can I say I’m sorry enough
For doing so much wrong
I’ve had it all and wasted more
Yet for Your mercy I still long

As I spend some time and think of the gifts
You have gently put into my care
I ask for help in using them well
For these are given to me to share

You listen, You care, You know my heart
How weak and down I am
I can’t believe yet again You say
I still love you, just learn and try again

How I marvel at Your patience with me
As I struggle with the smallest of things
And try to use life to honor you
Lifting my heart in praise to sing…

Alleluia. Thanks be to God.

IX

To You oh Lord I bring my life
In all its imperfections
In sadness and joy
In gladness and more
I come as I am

From You oh Lord I ask for Your grace
Though I am not worthy
In emptiness and need
For help and support
I come as I am

I come as I am
Broken and weak
For Your love and forgiveness
For strength and clear vision
Of these things I seek

For Your love and Your mercy
I ask of all these things
I will try again, I’m sorry
Your forgiveness sweetness brings

For I come as I am
Your child, created in love
To ask for Your grace
To help mend my heart
In this Your holy place

X

Through the blinding light of sun
You help me to clearly see
That my life has been so apart from You
Closer to You should I always strive to be

In the heat and in the dryness
Of summer times away
I know that Your loving cool grace
Come like a flowing spring each day

I visit You Jesus
This hour do I pray
And lift my eyes up to find You
To see You more clearly this day

This time I return to You oh Lord
Oh God of all space and time
From my life’s time I take it
It never has been mine

I see my wrongs and pause to pray
For change of heart and life
That I may lead a better way
And end my sin and strife

Thank You for the gift of summer days
When the warmth of sun on my face
Reminds me always of
Your mercy and boundless grace

XI

I look to You my dear Jesus
My gaze fixed upon Your stares
In awe and wonder as I kneel
And speak humbly through my prayers

The gift of Your presence
My mind, spirit, and soul
Can barely fathom nor speak of it
Nor grasp this miracle at all

In sheer amazement and wonder
How this came to be
The Creator of all things; here
For lowly me to see!

I bow down now and ask You
Oh God, Creator, King,
To look down on me now in favor
Your graces to me please bring

In awe and wonder this blessing rare
Is here in my humble tent
That the God of all Creation
Would be here in simple form
What blessing immense

We kneel, we pray, to You each day
In this special place
And beg forgiveness and ask for strength
That comes only through Your grace

XII

I pine for You oh Lord of all
As I spend these moments in prayer
In Your presence to You I call
For I know You are always here

I come here and You listen
As I open my heart
And tell You all things hidden
You knew from the start

And yet again I am comforted
Knowing You are here
In a special way now present
To soothe all my fear

I bring my life’s burdens
To You for Your help
And ask for direction
Not just for myself

I sit and am filled up
With awe of this place
Where I can be with You
And be present in Your grace

I want now to join You
To have You now in me
As I head out into life again
And bring You with me

I long for communion
When I can be closest to You
To join with Your Body
In all that I do

XIII

Alone with You but also with
All who live and ever lived
I offer myself to You my Maker
From whom all life has been given

My prayers like incense rise to You
Please listen and hear me this day
My plea, Your answer in Your right time
Is given in surprising ways

You wait for me to come back to You
From wanderings far and distractions near
No matter how long, or how distant I am
Of Your patience I need not fear

I call to You, my Father above
To come into my life today
And open my heart to Your great love
And will live a better life this day

A vessel, broken in sadness I plead
That You will repair my break
And fill me up with Your lasting love
To be poured out for my neighbor’s sake

I’m here, Lord hear me
As I ask to seek Your will
Be with me, beside me
Help me climb this lonely hill

XIV

Hello Jesus, it’s me again
I’m here to spend some time
Waiting and seeking, I kneel and I pray
And spend moments I know are not mine

I stop by just for mere moments
To end my long troubled day
And thank You for little favors
I’ve received along the way

As I look back and see how I lived it
I wonder how I drifted away
And ask for another chance tomorrow
To right my wrongs and repay

Reflecting on what I did here
In my little world of time and place
I’m comforted to know now
That there’s no end to Your healing grace

So I’m here, now again, today
To spend some short time with You
In Your awesome presence, I know
You’re always here for me too

Thank You dear Jesus
For the gift of today
Help me bring You tomorrow
To all, through all, I do and I say

XV

In the eyes of the saddened
Looking for comfort and peace
To ease their heart’s burdens
Lord use me; show me how

On the lips of the angry
Hurting and striking out at me
Help me hear them clearly
Lord use me; show me how

On the face of the lonely,
Longing and searching for love
Help me be really present
Lord use me; show me how

In the questions of the searching
Looking for meaning and truth
Help me bring You to them
Lord use me; show me how

In the hopeless and the lost
Who know not where to turn or to go
Help me be a steady guide
Lord use me; show me how

In those feeling worthless and poor
Not knowing their gifts or caring
Help me serve and honor their being
Lord use me; show me how

In the sick and the dieing
Who see life only as past and now
Help me be a companion, a comfort
Lord use me; show me how

In the young and the restless
Who seek, and try, and challenge
Help me to show them that life is love
Lord use me; show me how

Lord use me. Show me how. Help me use best, Your gifts given
I empty myself and I listen and wait…open to where You lead me
Help me; fill me; lead me; show me how

XVI

I am humbled and broken and weak now
But still I kneel again in Your presence
For You already know too well
What I need, what makes sense

You’ve given me my very life, oh Lord
To live it well, and to love
And pray that I humbly follow
Your words given from above

Dear Lord,
I pray, You listen
I ask, You answer
I cry, You console me
I worry, You care for me
I listen, You speak
I fail, You show mercy

You ask, I must answer
You teach, I must learn
You listen, I must speak to You
You forgive, I must change
You died, that I might live
You’re really present, that I may believe

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“The deeper we go into the dark night of the uncomprehended God and trust in Him, the more we will discover Him and the bond of love and freedom that will carry us through any and every night.”

(A quote from “God Near Us“ by Cardinal Joseph Ratzinger, Now Pope Benedict XVI)

Andy Cirmo
Eucharistic Adorer
Pope John Paul II Eucharistic Chapel
St. Elizabeth Seton Parish
Naperville, IL.